Don't Give Away Your Power

In recent years, companies have marketed Buddha in a Box, Goddess in a Box, Teen Spell Kits, Books for Dummies, Complete Idiots Guides to whatever.

I know some of you may be wondering what's wrong with that.

Look at it this way. If you get a little box with a statue, a candle, a stick of incense and an instruction sheet, that does not really give you a good understanding or appreciation for that spiritual path. These marketers are saying "you don't really need to understand a lot of stuff. Just take the goddess out of the box and light your incense and candle. Don't worry about why we chose this goddess for the box instead of one of the other ones. It's not important."

Marketers have been dumbing us down by proffering books that imply that we don't really need to waste time researching subjects by going to different sources and comparing texts. It is as if they are saying "you don't have to waste your time on all those other things. Just take this one book and it will tell you everything you need to know."

It's like the kind of news that many have settled for where we are presented with a minute or two of this and a minute or two of that, and we are going to try and understand important events and changes based on those minute glimpses into what's happening. Or we are presented with shows where people with more opinions than facts yell at each other, as if that will help us understand important decisions and their ramifications.

In order to make the best decisions for ourselves, we have to be able to gather information, digest ideas and decide for ourselves what makes sense, what works, and what we want.

See how the information feels for you. Consider whether the information makes sense to you. Notice how you get comfortable with your decisions and whether you feel that you can live with them.

Be skeptical about these things that come prepackaged. Your most satisfying practice of spirituality might be found in using a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

Your greatest understanding of the news and important decisions facing us might be a result of a combination of your own experiences, your observations about how things work, plus some research to find out what you don't know. Takes a little more time and effort to do things this way, but it is well worth it.

Don't give away your power. Take the time to use all your resources and claim your power to live your life in a way that makes sense for you. The best answers to a lot of our questions will come from the extra thought we put into it, the feelings we consider, the extra listening and looking we do, rather than from what we are being presented by the marketers.

When do you feel most alive?

When do you feel most alive? Is it something that you can do right now? Is it something you can do later today or tonight?

If the answer to this question makes you stop and think, good.

If the answer to this question comes to you quickly, will you act on it?

There are always reasons to postpone doing something we have been thinking of doing. These diminish our sense of aliveness. Once you realize this, do you sense any shift in willingness? Do you reset priorities to take things off your list or move things up?

How many times do we stand in the way of our own happiness? Do you stop yourself from doing things because you are afraid of what others will think?

So ask yourself again. If you set aside concerns about what others might think, or things that require money that you simply don't have, what would you like to do today?

There are passing thoughts about what you would like to do, and there are recurring thoughts about what you would like to do. The recurring thoughts are the ones that deserve your attention.

What can you possibly do today that would make you feel more alive?

Expectations

It is interesting how many times we get let down when we have expectations. When we just proceed with whatever we have to do, life presents us with all kinds of gifts. Expectations can be a trap, because they are about how we think things will turn out.

Expectations are centered in the future and may or may not happen, and they can set us up for disappointments.

These are different than visions for the future which may involve goals we are working towards. For example, if you and another person have an agreement to work toward achieving a goal, then you measure your progress toward it.

However, if there is an assumption on either party's part that is not agreed on, one person may be counting on a result while the other feels no commitment to it, and as a result one person is happy while the other is unhappy.

The way to avoid being disappointed by the failure of expectations is by making and keeping agreements.

Life is much more joyful if you just do what you need to do and then accept whatever good fortune comes your way.

Here is another thing I learned long ago. Revolutions never come when we feel at our absolute lowest point. They come when things start to get better, because then we know that they can get better and so we feel our desires fired up and we have the energy to reach for more. The fact that we are no longer at the absolute bottom is inspiring. When there is movement, there is reason for hope, and hope gives birth to action.

Expectation without agreement is like positive thinking without action to give it traction. They present us false hope. Agreements and action give us strength to move forward and create the life we want.

Decisive, Liberating Actions

Yesterday I was working with a client who is having a hard time moving forward with the actions she needs to take. She kept procrastinating and distracting herself because she realized that moving forward means saying goodbye to her old identity.

The old identity that we need to let go of is sometimes wrapped up in sentimentality or ego, and those present stumbling blocks.

Many of us face that when we change careers. It was a real jolt for me when I changed careers and went from having a good salary and benefits to a straight commission sales job. Years later, after being happy and comfortable being a magazine editor for about 10 years, it was hard to adjust to the fact that the business had changed and I needed to change. I had to get a clear look at my future, make another plan, and then act on it. Each time, the shift itself looked daunting, but once I made the leap and shifted gears, everything worked out.

My client is in a similar situation. She is creating a new business for herself and she intends to remain the sole owner. Her resources include some household goods and personal items that remain from her old life that can be sold to bring in enough cash to fund the new venture without taking on debt or a partner.

She is realizing that memories of the past when she had a big house full of elegant furnishings is not where she is any more. The lifestyle that works for her now is a smaller house, nicely furnished with other available money funding her business. The remnants of the old lifestyle are actually a liability, because they do not generate any cash or function in any way to bring in clients, but when she moves again, it will cost a significant amount of money to move it all once more. Selling those items now and using the cash to fund the new business turns them into an asset. It will not only fund the new business which will provide her income in the present and future years, but it will also make it much less costly to move when it comes time to move.

Once we really recognize the truth that hanging onto baggage from the past can prevent us from having a better future, then the present choices become easier to make, and the required actions are not only decisive, but liberating.

If the career we used to have is no longer available to us now, then we have to create a new one. And we have to do whatever it takes to make that work. In so many ways, the person we used to be cannot continue to define our future if we are to survive and live well.

Letting go, in so many ways, is the key to success, growth and freedom. Being at peace with who you are now and what you are doing allows you to act decisively, swiftly, and without remorse. Be who you are now, and taste freedom and strength as you breathe in and step forward. Gives you chills, doesn't it?

Boldness Has Genius, Magic and Power In It

I am paraphrasing from memory from the great German poet, Goethe: "Whatever you dream you can do, begin it. For boldness has genius, magic and power in it."

As most of you reading this know, I am working as a professional tarot reader weekends and evenings at all kinds of fairs, festivals special events, private parties and for individual clients in private. I also do reiki healing and past life sessions, and a variety of other things. I love this work and I am focused on making that my full time source of income.

During my life, I have had the opportunity to experience many different jobs and careers. Some I took when I was simply in need of cash flow, so it was a whatever job. That would be like my current day job at the computer company, or the factory jobs I had when I was just out of high school, working for a commercial printing company, as a file clerk for a big law firm, as a janitor for a school, as a shipping clerk in a warehouse, loading trucks on a loading dock, repairing surveyor's instruments.

Other times I took jobs out of sheer curiousity like when I was a security guard for the Chicago Cubs baseball team one season, when I worked at a picture framer for an art gallery, when I worked as a cab driver, when I delivered pizzas, delivering daily newspapers in the middle of the night or working at a retreat center in the mountains.

Some jobs I took on a lark, like bartending, were so much fun that they lasted for several years. Being a bartender and a waiter was a great part time gig and fallback position in a crunch, even years later. People will always drink, and they need someone who knows how to pour and mix. Then there were the years when I worked for the American Red Cross organizing blood drives. That was a curiosity that turned into a career for several years too, and moved me around the country.

I worked as an advertising salesman for trade publications, in turn led to working for an advertising agency, which in turn led to being an advertising copywriter, and a freelance writer. And that led into my career as a magazine editor, which again started on a whim and turned into another career move that spanned a number of years. And that ran in tandem with being a teacher of creative writing for a decade. I also self published two books of poetry and produced shows for a couple of years as a performance artist, and although I was unable to find a way to make those pursuits profitable, they were fun. There are probably a few other things that I forgot to mention, but we'll let that slide for now.

I have met people who have had one job or one career their entire life. I don't think I could have done that. It has been interesting to do all these different things, to meet all these different people.

As I was reflecting on all this, it came to me quite clearly that there is one simple, very powerful thread running through it all.

If you do not do what you need to do in order to make a living doing something you like, you will find yourself doing something you don't like for a living.

Yes, there is that gray zone in the middle where people don't really like or dislike what they do. They just clock in and do something in return for a paycheck and can't wait to get off work so that they can do something they enjoy.

For me, making a living doing something that you can get out of bed looking forward to doing is as good as it gets. Well, that part of your life anyway.

Don't pull out any stops. If there is something that gives you satisfaction to do and you get good feedback on what you do from customers or clients, do whatever it takes to organize that activity into something that can provide your income.

I am working diligently to get back to that place. You can too. It is worth every bit of the effort. Do whatever you need to do to get into a place that you like. That place where your efforts are rewarded and you have a smile on your face. It looks good on you.

Climbing the Mountain

Picture this analogy. The top of the mountain is your goal. Whether that mountain top represents your work, your ideal partnership, your aspirations to write a book, paint pictures, make films, plant a beautiful garden, become a joyful and fluid dancer, to play a musical instrument, to make pottery out of clay, to work on an archeological dig, to go back to school and earn a degree in another field, to start your own business and have it become profitable so that it alone will support you.

Whatever you set as your goal is the top of the mountain.

Now consider how avid hikers approach the mountian. Their goal is to get to the top. So what do they do? They look at everything that is in their backpack and start taking out everything that they do not need, because everything they carry weighs something. So if they can leave things behind, that makes it more possible to reach the top.

Backpackers take a good look at everything and see it in a way that other people do not. They look at ways to take the things they need but without the extra parts. They look at ways to reduce the weight of what they need. There are essentials like food, water, a first aid kit, a knife, a sweater, a rain poncho. The question underlying all of it is: how do I make it so that I have everything I need while carrying as light a pack as possible? That is an important part of what allows me to get to the top of the mountain.

I had that experience when I moved here, and I had to pack light. Things that I thought I would always have suddenly had no place in my next stage of the journey. What I discovered when I got here is that I could, in fact, live well without all those things, and I managed to find replacements for everything I really needed, and a few other things I liked simply for the sheer joy and beauty.

When we look at our belongings, for example, and we are trying to start a new business, and that business needs capital, then we can either take on the burden of debt, try and find others who will give us loans and so on.

And there is another choice. We can look at all the stuff we have in closets or storage and see if we can turn it into cash to fund the new venture. We can look at all the things in our living space and see what can be sold. Can we do without it or will a less expensive model serve the purpose quite well while the collector's item or luxury edition funds the new business?

We find the same is true for beliefs and concepts. I had one friend years ago who thought that his target market for what he was selling was one thing, but as he got going, he discovered that his best customers wanted something else. A person who is too certain of their own beliefs might have kept pushing the original concept, and may or may not have found success. My friend followed the customer's lead and emphasized what they wanted and de-emphasized the original plan, and he became successful.

The question we each face is what weight are we willing to leave behind in order to get to the top of the mountain?

Are we focused on that goal? Would we sell an old keepsake in order to get to the top? Would we be willing to condition ourselves with many short hikes in order to get ready for the longer hike? Would we be willing to wear a pair of funny looking shoes or a funny looking hat if that's what it took?

If selling a watch, piece of jewelry, a piece of furniture, a piece of art or a collectible item provides us the money to fund our new business, and that new business will provide us income for this year and the years after, is it not worth it to let go of the things we have been carrying?

Relationships and Our Life Path

In one sense, the relationships that we have had are never really over, because our memories and experiences become part of our life, our consciousness, part of our soul. And these carry forward with us. Our life experiences are the one thing that are truly ours. Yes, the relationships are over in the sense that we will continue our life journey while participating in other relationships, but what we have learned is the part that goes with us.

Ending one relationship and tasting the sadness of that experience means that we now have had the opportunity to know the full human range of ecstasy and sadness that this relationship had to teach us, and we have survived to continue on our life path and have more relationships. We always begin a new relationship with hope and great expectations, and that is why when a relationship ends, we are reminded of those stops on our life path, the map of our journey so far, landmarks where those things we want to keep and those things that we want to let go of made a significant impact on us, and we are reminded to carry our lessons forward. These serve to help us choose the best steps for us on that the next stage of our journey, providing us with an inner compass that yields a stronger sense of direction so that we can draw ever more satisfaction from our continuing journey.

We are not defined or limited by what we have done, because our experiences will also point the way to what we can do. Much in the same way that our resume tells what kind of work we have done, that does not define all that we can do.

From each relationship, we retain certain memories that serve to teach us some valuable life lessons. Of course, few of us could remember everything about a past relationship, but those things we choose to keep with us are our milestones. These are our markers of progress on our life path.

The important things we carry forward are not things that we can pack in boxes or haul in cars and trucks. We learn as we go to value what is good and what is worth keeping. We also learn what is important to us, what we are not willing to let go of, and we resume doing those things that we used to enjoy but let fall by the wayside. We realize what lessons we do not want to keep repeating. As we open to new journeys with new people, we explore the areas of the map that are unknown. We will still travel familiar roads on journeys to and from our true selves, we will notice things we have not noticed before.

It is like when we drive down the same road to and from work many times over, and then one day, a store or restaurant catches our eye, and we feel drawn to stop in. The experience is good and we wonder why we never stopped there before. Our habits and patterns can lead us to overlook things, and that is why sometimes the jolt from a change, from an ending, reawakens us and renews us.

What we carry forward are the invisible rhythms of life that work their way outward to shape the expressions on our faces, the depth of our souls, the language of our bodies, the expressions of our creative spirits, the light of life that shows in our eyes.

Each person we have had a relationship with has affected us, and that will always be part of who we are, from that time forward. Some relationships may mutate into a different form, such as a lasting friendship, while others we may choose to let fade. But whether they are brilliant glimmers of soul light or shadows that walk with us, they all form part of the whole picture.
As we extract the lessons from each and drink deeply of their nourishment, there is something for us, something that feeds our hunger, quenches our thirst, and shapes our consciousness, even if some of these gifts of wisdom and love can only be savored from a distance in time, when we have more perspective and see the bigger picture.

When we can own it all, we can uncover the gems that we did not see until we turned them over, the illumination from the light on our path and the mysterious and hard won ways that it often comes to us.