Always New Beginnings

As long as we are living and breathing, there is always time for new beginnings. One reason that life seems difficult at times is because an illusion is shattered, and that illusion is something that we used to believe in.

Look at our love life and relationships. Many of us were raised with the idea that people have one marriage and it lasts a lifetime. This concept was portrayed in movies, books, TV shows and sung about in popular music. So that was the standard that was held up for us.

Yet, in real life, what happened? How many of us watched family members get divorced or separated? How many of us have been married more than once? How many of us have at one time or another felt like a failure because of this? Compared to the ideal model that was held up for us, we did not measure up. Yet realistically, for many of us, it was simply the right thing to do.

How many people in earlier generations were taught that you don't get divorced even if you are married to a drunk, junkie, compulsive gambler or an abusive person? But a social stigma was attached to divorced people back then, and perhaps even more difficult economic times. I absolutely believe that if some of those same people had lived in our time, they would have gotten divorces too. I believe that the ability to divorce is a good thing.

So it makes for interesting family get togethers during the holiday season when people are getting introduced and sometimes it is hard to keep track of how we are related to each other.

It is also interesting how people can frequently get along well, long after the fact, and the living together time is long gone, but people are still able to socialize with their exes and half siblings and the whole spectrum of relationships. Extended families can be really extended.

As we celebrate the holiday season and perhaps get together with all our relations and friends, notice how it is possible to still share joy and good feelings. Sometimes the distance in time and/or geography helps nurture kindness and understanding.

True, there are break ups that are bitter and full of animosity, and for these people, perhaps there will never be a healing or civil interactions. It is my observation though, that it is more common that the people involved realize that their relationship only lasted for a part of a lifetime, they got their lessons from it, moved on, and are still capable of maintaining friendly terms.

Holiday gatherings offer countless opportunities to shed light on these relationships and lessons, and enjoy the new combinations we now find ourselves in, the new relationships, and having grown since we formed those earlier ties, we can look back and look forward with the same perspective, knowing that no matter what the reasons why the last relationship did not work out, there is always a possibility that the next one will.

During this season when people are wishing each other well and making plans for the new year, it is important to remember this. It is never too late to start over. There is always a way to bring more joy into our life. During the season of celebrations of light, light can be shed on our life, our path, and our prospects. If there is one thing that this season teaches us, it is that we all have opportunities to rise up from the dark and cold and bask in the warmth and light.

Come sit by the fire, taste the pleasures of the moment and toast the hope, joy and desire for what is next.